The following text is from a talk I gave in church on February 17, 2008.
Choices
“It has been said that the gate of history turns on small hinges, and so do people’s lives.”
Author's note from "Choose Your Own Adventure #3: Space and Beyond":
BEWARE and WARNING!
This book is different from other books.
You and YOU ALONE are in charge of what happens in this story.
There are dangers, choices, adventures and consequences. YOU must use all of your numerous talents and much of your enormous intelligence. The wrong decision could end in disaster –even death. But, don’t despair. At anytime, YOU can go back and make another choice, alter the path of your story, and change its result.
First you must choose the planet of your birth. The choice YOU make will determine a major part of your future. Try to choose wisely. As they say in another galaxy not far from this one, Gleeb Fogo!
Good luck!
Many of us have read a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book sometime in our lives. At the turn of a page you can become a hero or a victim, forever forgotten in the pages of history. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been killed by one of these books. The thrill is in the adventure, and as the book promises, you can turn back at any time and change your course.
Likewise, our lives are full of decisions we have to make everyday. This is an especially important time of our lives for we are at a crossroads. President Monson has said time and time again that, “Decisions determine destiny,” (Elder Thomas S. Monson, New Era, November 1979). I know exactly what he is talking about. I feel like right now I am at the center of a bicycle wheel, and I have a choice between all the different spokes that surround me, and any choice I make will lead off on an ultimately unknown path. It is difficult to know what to do. It would be much harder if I didn’t have the gospel.
Speaking in the April 2004 Priesthood Session, President James E. Faust said, “In this life we have to make many choices. Some are very important choices. Some are not. Many of our choices are between good and evil. The choices we make, however, determine to a large extent our happiness or our unhappiness, because we have to live with the consequences of our choices. Making perfect choices all of the time is not possible. It just doesn’t happen. But it is possible to make good choices we can live with and grow from,” (Choices, Ensign, May 2004).
President Faust outlined five types of choices we make in our lives. (I don’t think he meant it to be an inclusive list.) They are as follows,
1. Some choices present good opportunities no matter which road we take
2. Some of our important choices have a time line
3. Some people find it hard to make a decision
4. Some choices have greater consequences than others
5. Some choices for fulfillment and happiness should be made only once
President Monson said that the three most important choices we make in life are, “What will be my faith? Whom shall I marry? What will be my life’s work?” (Decisions Determine Destiny, New Era, November 1979). I think that third one is where most of us are at right now.
My life was pretty easy up until I turned 21. I had an easy time choosing a major and a university to transfer to. Then it was time to decide whether or not to serve a mission. After months of studying it out, I decided to put off my senior year and serve. This made my parents pretty nervous but I was able to come back to school and graduate the next year. During my senior year I had to decide whether or not to apply to graduate school. Then I had to decide which program to apply for. After a lot of stressful weeks of indecision, I made my choice and completed three applications. It was easy to choose between the acceptances I’d received and then I put it out of my mind for four months. That summer I had a change of heart. I had a choice between moving back to California to continue school but go into debt, or stay in Utah and get a job. Two days before I was supposed to move back to California, I made my choice. I stayed here. I found a job and I thought everything was set. Then I had trouble at work and decided it was best to leave as soon as I found another job. I have been searching for a job for four weeks. The first three weeks of the search were very disheartening, even demoralizing. Last Friday I found out I didn’t get a job I really had my hopes up for. I emailed my mom because I was too upset to call her. The next day I spoke to her and she told me the night before had been Ward Temple Night. She’d gone alone because my dad had been out late the night before that working on a murder case. She had a lot of second thoughts as to whether or not she wanted to go. She decided to go through with it and had a great feeling of peace when she was at the temple. But it wasn’t just the normal feeling she was used to – she had the impression that things were going to work out for me very soon. When she told me she put my name on the prayer roll, it broke my heart and healed it at the same time.
It is difficult for me to fathom the powers of heaven being called upon by servants of the Lord in his holy temple for someone like me. Someone who doesn’t have any ailment or tragedy to mourn. Someone who’s basically normal. My struggle had seemed so small to me in the weeks before and I felt very alone. It took me a week to tell my parents about my job search because I didn’t want to worry them. Yesterday I found a quote that reads, “Trouble is part of your life, and if you don’t share it, you don’t give the person who loves you a chance to love you enough,” (Dinah Shore). It is true. We have to share our burdens and offer others chances to serve us. If we are fortunate enough to be free of such trials, we need to look for opportunities to serve. President Monson admonishes us to make three choices, “Fill your minds with truth, fill your hearts with love, and fill your lives with service,” (Choose Ye This Day, Ensign, November 2004).
My mom’s faith gave me hope to try harder and be more optimistic this week. This week I had two really great interviews. Yesterday I was offered one job and on Tuesday I’ll receive another offer. My deadline for the decision is Tuesday. Now I get to torture myself with the decision, but I have tools to help me. (No one else can make the decision for me – “The volition of [man] is free; this is a law of their existence, and the Lord cannot violate his own law; were he to do that, he would cease to be God,” Brigham Young quoted by Howard W. Hunter, Ensign, November 1989.) I found several pieces of counsel while preparing this talk. I assume that most of you are dealing with choosing a major as opposed to choosing between jobs right now. One repeated counsel I found in the brethrens’ messages was to have a plan and make priorities. Don’t be like Alice in Wonderland (Alice: “Which path should I follow?” Cheshire Cat: “That depends on where you want to go. If you do not know where you want to go, it doesn’t matter which path you take.”), not knowing where you want to go.
When Robert D. Hales served as the Presiding Bishop (1988) he said, “There are three important elements that will allow us to make good decisions:
1) First, we must have an eternal plan with objectives that we are committed to achieve.
2) Second, we need to study and pray on a daily basis about our decisions for feelings for spiritual guidance, courage and commitment.
3) Third, we need to examine our motives each time we make a decision.”
I think the most important to us right now is being aware of our true motives. Elder Hales elaborated, “We make poor and irrational decisions if our decision is motivated by greediness: greed for monetary gain; greed for the results in a conflict of interest; desire for power, titles and recognition of men. … Likewise, we make poor and irrational decisions if we are motivated by fear: fear of man, fear of not being popular, fear of failure, fear of public opinion,” (Making Righteous Choices at the Crossroads of Life, Ensign, November 1988).
Follow President Monson’s advice, “I urge you not to take counsel of your fears. I hope you will not say, ‘I’m not smart enough to study chemical engineering; hence, I’ll study something less strenuous.’ ‘I can’t apply myself sufficiently well to study this difficult subject or in this comprehensive field; hence, I’ll choose the easier way.’ I plead with you to choose the hard way and tax your talents. Our Heavenly Father will make you equal to your tasks. If one should stumble, if one should take a course and get less than the ‘A’ grade desired, I hope such a one will not let it become a discouraging thing to him. I hope that he will rise and try again,”(Decisions Determine Destiny, New Era, November 1979).
(“My counsel to returning missionaries and to each young person is that you should study and prepare for your life’s work in a field that you enjoy, because you are going to spend a good share of your life in that field. I believe it should be a field that will challenge your intellect and a field that will make maximum utilization of your talents and capabilities; and finally, I think it should be a field that will provide you sufficient remuneration to provide adequately for a companion and children.”) (Monson, 1979)
He also said, “At times many of us let that enemy of achievement – even that culprit ‘self-defeat’ – dwarf our aspirations, smother our dreams, cloud our vision and impair our lives. The enemy’s voice whispers in our ears, ‘You can’t do it.’ ‘You’re too young.’ ‘You’re too old.’ ‘You’re nobody.’ This is when we remember that we are created in the image of God. Reflection on this truth provides a profound sense of strength and power,” (Choose Ye This Day, Ensign, November 2004).
In the end, “The greatest battle of life is fought within the silent chambers of your own soul,” (President David O. McKay quoted by President Monson Choose Ye This Day, Ensign, November 2004). We may go to others for advice, but as someone once said, “We only make a dupe of the friend whose advice we ask, for we never tell him all; and it is usually what we have left unsaid that decides our conduct,” (Diane de Poitiers). President Monson taught that we need to each have our own “Sacred Grove.” God is the only person who knows all the sides of our story. We need to seek a peaceful refuge where we can commune with him and study out our choices and the consequences of our decisions in our minds.
Sometimes anxiety clouds our judgment. Arthur Somers Roche said, “Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.” Worry and distress are tools Satan uses to distract us from the most important things in life. When Jesus visited Mary and Martha, “Martha was cumbered about much serving.” When she complained that her sister was not helping her, Jesus said, “Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her.” (Compare to D&C 66:10)
Don’t worry about being perfect. Leave that to the Savior. We are meant to learn things the hard way and deal with frustration and shortcomings. We even make wrong choices.
The introduction to “Choose Your Own Adventure: Tattoo of Death” reads:
WARNING!!!
Do not read this book straight through from beginning to end. These pages contain many different adventures you may have when you are lured into the Red Flowers, a dangerous gang dealing in the trade of human lives. These thugs are modern-day slavers, and their blackmail is pressuring you and your family to help them with their deadly scheme.
From time to time as you read along, you will be asked to make a choice. The adventures you have are the results of your choices. You are responsible because you choose. After you make a decision, follow the instructions to find out what happens to you next.
From the waterfronts of Los Angeles to the exotic world of Kyoto, Japan, it will be difficult to escape the gang’s grasp. Think carefully before you act. The Red Flowers play for keeps and have ways to make those who cross them regret it. You may outwit the gang and bring their evil business crashing down –or you may find yourself turned into shark food, another innocent victim of the Red Flowers’ ruthless ways.
Good Luck!
While in “Choose Your Own Adventure” your fate seems to be up to you, it is actually depends on the creative whim of an author you’ll never meet. Our Father in Heaven is a just god and has placed our destiny in our own hands, no matter how much Satan tries to convince us nothing is in our control.
Speaking of wrong choices, Howard W. Hunter said, “Given the freedom to choose, we may, in fact, make wrong choices, bad choices, hurtful choices. And sometimes we do just that, but that is where the mission and mercy of Jesus Christ comes into full force and glory. He has taken upon himself the burden of all the world’s risk. He has provided a mediating atonement for the wrong choices we make. He is our advocate with the Father and has paid, in advance, for the faults and foolishness we often see in the exercise of our freedom. We must accept his gift, repent of those mistakes, and follow his commandments in order to take full advantage of this redemption. The offer is always there; the way is always open. We can always, even in our darkest hour and most disastrous errors, look to the Son of God and live,” (The Golden Thread of Choice, Ensign, November 1989).
While the only true risk while reading a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book is sustaining a paper cut, we must always remember that our real-life choices can quickly steer us in the path of mortal and spiritual and danger. The only real way to flip the page and start again is by appealing to our intercessor, Jesus Christ. I know that as we study the scriptures and follow promptings from on high we will be led in the path of wisdom and righteousness. Just as there are many wrong paths there are also many correct paths. We just have to choose which one is best for us. That we may all be able to do this is my prayer in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
